For the longest time, for some unknown reason the phrase Who Wore it Best and this type of comparison has always rubbed me the wrong way. In the last 3-5 years this new “game” of Who Wore It Best” started to creep up both in print publications and online. When two women are photographed in the same outfit this question is posited and then readers are polled as to who they think looks better in the outfit. Now there are other versions of the comparative pondering, one of which is “Who’d you Rather” (as in sleep with) Which also makes me feel a bit out side of myself.
Where comparisons are a natural and common part of life, and a very real way create a standard or scale by which things are measured, comparisons in and of themselves are not always negative. That having been stated, there are times when comparisons can turn on you and become detrimental. It is my opinion that the trouble starts when judgement becomes a part of comparison. I find that comparisons without the judgment of greater than or less than work best, i.e here are two things that are seemingly quite alike however when studied you’ll note their differences, without making one neither better or worse than the other, and simply noting those differences it is possible to honor them both by recognizing their singularity. They simply are what they are. Albeit when two things are judged with one thing given more value then another things can potentially turn ugly.
I think it’s best illustrated in the comparison of siblings, it’s fine to make observations “Jane is tall and Mary is short” which may be a plain fact but when you assign value to them, one over the other, that’s where issues are born.
Sure the act of comparison does give context, it is the way that we as humans get a handle on things including where we fit into the whole mix, and that’s fine when it is necessary, but taking it to a level of creating polls where by people vote on whether or not someone is hot or not, or hotter then someone else just for entertainment (regardless of how the results make the loser feel) seems a bit unnecessary and on a level cruel. I know we can’t make it go away, but I am proposing that we take a good hard look, at our relationship to the way we compare, the why and how; and take into consideration that as we compare so are we compared– hate to get biblical but it does fit on two counts, judge not lest you be judged, and perhaps the one that might give us greater pause, do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
No one like to be compared, or more the point compared with judged, we just want to be accepted and taken as we are warts, bulges, bones and all
I’m not judging, I’m just making an observation- It’s just something to think about!